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Rough day.

Today has been one of those "good thing she's cute" sort of days. In a moment of impulsiveness this afternoon, she did something she knew she shouldn't have, and I'm just thankful that nobody got hurt. She has been making a lot of impulsive decisions lately and we have had to pull the reins in a bit on allowing her to be as independent as she usually is with certain things. I've found myself feeling frustrated because of the things she's doing, but also because of the fact that she's doing them. Sometimes it's defiance just for the sake of defiance. Other times, it's getting distracted and forgetting where she's at and what she's doing, like in the school parking lot a couple weeks ago when I told her, "Stand right there, stay put, don't move, and hold still while I put Piper's car seat in the car." No sooner had those words escaped my lips and I turned to put the baby seat in the car then a bird caught her attention and she took off chasing after it. Thankfully there were no cars driving through the parking lot at that moment.
Most of the time, she's okay. Other times, she is impulsive and/or defiant and she scares me. I don't know how to make a 5 year old who knows better than to walk out the front door and go to the neighbor's house understand that she really can't be doing things like that. I've had growing concern lately about the fact that she has now learned how to unbuckle her car seat straps. She knows better than to do it while I'm driving, but that doesn't always mean that she won't. She is only a safe passenger when she is buckled into a 5 point harness. She's a loose cannon. A bull in the china shop. Heaven knows I love her more than words can say, I just don't know what to do with her sometimes. In addition to the one big thing she did today, she also broke an animal from the ceramic nativity that I had JUST asked her not to touch because it would break if she accidentally dropped it. At 5, that is not an unreasonable expectation. The icing on the cake (which was completely not her fault) was when I realized that the feeding pump charger is broken. Of course it's a charger that was given to us so we actually own it, which means we can't send it back to the company for a replacement. (they wrote the serial numbers on the rental agreement)
On the bright side, we did get the Christmas tree put up and the kids hung the ornaments (or "ordaments" if you ask them) after school.  It's starting to look festive in our house and that makes everybody happy. Now that it's almost midnight, I'm going to check on the pump to see if it's still charging, stare at her sweetly sleeping little face for a minute or two, and then go to sleep for a couple hours until the pump starts squawking at me. Tomorrow is a new day, thank goodness.


  1. If it makes you feel any better I have the some of the same worries with Jovi. She doesn't care about consequences good or bad. She does whatever she wants regardless of what she's asked or told to do. It drives me crazy! I know that part of it is the age, but I'm pretty sure most of it is just her. It is scary and frustrating.


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